So, the decision had been made, I was going to start my search. I had no idea where to start. I talked to my mom and asked her who they went through for the adoption. She told me social services. I was a bit relieved to know that because I have heard many stories of christian agencies that were used and the adoptee can not retrieve their information.
I called the local social services here in town and thought I would start there and they should be able to tell me what steps I need to take to get the information I am looking for. She was very nice and very helpful. She told me I needed to petition the court to have my records opened. She gave contact information to the state capital and the division I needed to contact for those papers. I contacted them and they said they would send me the papers I needed.
It seemed like forever to get here and when they finally did I filled them out and took them to the courthouse. Once I took them there they said they would call me when the judge had signed them. It felt like a couple days was a week! I finally got the call and headed back to the courthouse. I could make copies of whatever papers I wanted out of there. So I found some names and papers I wanted and made copies. I scoured over the pages. Looking for the names of the people who made me. There they were.....right in front of me. I had this feeling of being overwhelmed but excited. I looked over the pages and was searching for medical history. There was nothing there. Then I decided I will need to open my adoption records through Social Services. Again, it felt like a lifetime to get the papers.
The day they came I was almost afraid to open them. I kind of just sat there looking at it, almost waiting for the package to talk to me and say it was okay to open them. Finally, I opened the package. There was a huge pile of papers to look through. Now, even though I was looking through for birth parent information I saw that they had the questionnaire form my adoptive parents filled out. This was so cool to see. Again, I searched for any medical information and found only what we already knew about a grandmothers sister having diabetes. I thought this can't be it and by now there has to be more information. So, I went to look at the other papers and again there were their names, but there was also the name I was given when I was born....Gayli Jo. Now, I have told my adoptive mother that I was pretty glad they had changed it because I can imagine the names I would have been called. I probably would have just gone by Jo or something. But seeing the other name really brought out this feeling in me. I felt like I had two identities, I like to call it dual identities. I was one person when I was born and now like a spy I am someone else. It really created this struggle inside of me. I still to this day struggle a bit with it.
I searched through the rest of the papers and as I got further in I noticed a page that said please put this in the child's file. I went to the next page and saw a copy (a horrible copy I might add) of my birth parents marriage. Yes, they got married. Now some days I think this is awesome and every now and then I feel like I was the odd man out so to speak. The only one who got 'left behind'. It is a hard feeling to have but ultimately I am happy they are married.
And here is where the online search begins...
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